Don’t know how old they are - this was the first time I saw them. Just couldn’t resist, they are too good not to share.
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A 'heads up' for those men who may be regular Home Depot customers.
This one caught me by surprise...Over the last month or two I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your friends.
Here's how the scam works: Two seriously good-looking 20-21 year-old girls come over to your car as you are packing your shopping bags into the trunk.
They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their boobs almost falling out of their skimpy T- shirts. It is impossible not to look.
When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to McDonalds. You agree and they get in the back seat. On the way to McDonalds, they start undressing. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and starts crawling all over you, while the other one steals your wallet.
I had my wallet stolen December 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th & 29th.Also January 2nd, 4th, twice on the 8th, 16th, three times last Saturday and very likely again this upcoming weekend.
So tell your friends to be careful!!
P.S. Wal-Mart has wallets on sale for 2.99 each.
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Why women should not take men shopping
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women-she loved to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Target.
Dear Mrs. Johnson,
Over the past six months, your husband has
caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have
been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your
husband, Mr. Johnson, are listed below and are documented by our video
surveillance cameras.
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2 : Set all the alarm clocks in housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
And last, but not least:
15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.
Thank You.
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